Sir and I installed the couples card-matching app, Kindu, to try and find some more exciting things to do on date night. Normally, we have spaghetti bolognese by candlelight, but sometimes that can seem a bit samey. However, some of the ideas on the cards are absurd at best.
Owing to what we do, I decided to buy the “Jessica Rabbit’s Light Kink Volume 1” pack for £2.99 . Some of the cards in it, though, were more funny for my husband’s reaction to them than the cards were in and of themselves.
The card: She wears a shower cap and surprises you with a blow job
Sir’s reaction: Phwoar, yes! Everytime you leave your pink shower cap out on the side I’m tempted to spaff inside it. If you wear that to bed, I swear I’ll lose it completely!
The card: Make her wear wrist to arm and thigh to ankle restraints for sex.
Sir’s reaction: So you’ll be like an oven-ready chicken?
Sir: Cor, yes! Every time you buy a bird for our Sunday roast I look at it and think.. ‘nah, better not’.
The card: Unexpectedly restrain her to the chair during dinner and force feed her food and your dick.
Sir’s reaction: Here comes the aeroplane! (Pretends to unzip his flies) and here comes the jumbo jet…
The card: Have her wear Ben Wa balls to dinner and whisper words of encouragement throughout.
Sir’s reaction: Words of encouragement? What? (Whispers) I see you did a good job eating your shrimp. Amazing job eating your steak!
I wanted to share some of these reactions because they give you all an insight to my good Sir. He’s crazy, he’s funny, he’s lovely and I’m lucky to be loved by him. If you ever thought BDSM was all serious and no smiles, I seriously think this post will make you think again!